I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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