he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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