I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
