Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize