omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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