I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
