Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
