I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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