no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
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