This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Randomize
