I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
