Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
