I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
dude i'm inner monologue high
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
