no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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