I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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