shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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