i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
