We won't sleep together?
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Come see our sink grown plant.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
