They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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