You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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