Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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