You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
We had sex on a dog bed..
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize