Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Can I color on your dick again?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
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