Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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