butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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