I love black thongs
i jhust puked up my retainher.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize