Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize