But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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