Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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