It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
