I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
