He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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