You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I think I just sharted jello shots
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
