My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
It's Friday. Sex?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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