Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
