Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
