Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize
