one two three fourrrrnication!
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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