hotel room ftw
In America we eat man semen.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
