Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
