Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
