I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I want her autograph on my taint
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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