I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
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