VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
