It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
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