More tranny stories later!
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
