What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
