Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
