nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
