Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
