Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Four minutes until I can fart!
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
